The strangest meal ever

The day we arrived in Kotor we had the strangest meal ever. 

After checking in at our hotel late in the day and sitting around for an hour or so we found ourselves hungry and with only two restaurants within walking distance. 

The first one was closed and so we head off to find the second one. We are told it’s 400m away but after walking along the side (no footpath) of an unlit semi-rural road for 10mins we still hadn’t arrived. We decide to keep walking and finally come across a hotel with a restaurant! We struggle to find the entrance to the restaurant and then after browsing the menu have to go and find the waiter who is in the kitchen. At this point the only other people in the restaurant are leaving (they are clearly guests, we aren’t guests – the waiter is probably wondering where we came from). The menu was a bit strange but we managed to find things to order for a good price. The awkward waiter then brings out a complimentary starter which is a local dish. It’s basically some kind of weird two bread and cheese combo. I ask what the items are by pointing at them the conversation goes something like this: me “so what’s this dish?” Waiter “it’s a local dish” me “so what’s this?” *pointing at bread roll* Waiter “that’s bread” me “and this?” *pointing at toast-like thing* Waiter “that’s also bread” me “and this?” *pointing at ball of butter like stuff* Waiter “that’s cheese”. Me “oh so what do I do with the cheese?” Waiter “you put it on the bread” Ruth *giggles*. This whole conversation goes on in English but the waiter clearly isn’t fluent which makes the whole interaction even weirder. He also says ‘please’ after everything. “Would you like anything to drink, please?” “Can I get you anything else, please?” The meal comes and it’s not too odd, I get a salad and Ruth gets this strange breaded meat thing. We have numerous other interactions with the waiter for condiments and the arrival of the food and the like. 

We are alone in the restaurant the whole time. We start to wonder if the waiter thinks we are on a date and if we are a little mad.

I’ll be posting more about my Balkan trip soon. Thanks for reading,

Amanda xx

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